Only for a Season

These past few months have been a whirlwind of activity. We began searching for our first home in February, and after a couple weeks, we found one we could see ourselves growing into. Fast forward to April, and we’re unpacking boxes, cleaning, organizing, and moving furniture around the new house. The hubbs ( W ) has been putting up shelving in our pantry, and making sure the rest of the closet shelving is sturdy, since we noticed a lot of missing screws. He also spent an evening cleaning the carpets, because, although they are new, they got a lot of foot traffic when the previous owner had people paint, put down flooring, etc., and were very dusty.

W was finally able to take his belongings out of his storage unit and we’ll soon be using his king sized bed, as opposed to my queen sized (as soon as the bed pieces lost in a move, arrive in the mail). I can’t wait, because our baby girl has taken a liking to our bed, and it seems to be getting smaller and smaller, as she gets bigger and bigger.

Cookie girl just turned 9 months, and this move has been a little disruptive to her schedule. It took her about a week to get back to napping in her crib, in the new house. Which has been challenging for me, since it’s difficult to unpack boxes and clean, with her crawling around and getting into everything.

Moving without family around to help is very difficult, because you’re forced to ask friends–who have their own families and responsibilities–for help; but you don’t want to beg people, either. However, we’re extremely thankful to the few people who have been consistent blessings to our lives during big life events and transitions. Thus far, they have helped decorate and clean up before and after our wedding, and later, our baby shower; helped us move, twice; and even let us borrow a vehicle for a month or two, while we saved up to purchase one with cash. These aren’t just friends, they have shown themselves to be family.

Now, we’ve entered May and W is traveling for work, the house still isn’t anywhere near put-together, and I don’t think baby girl is feeling very well today. I’ve been feeling pretty isolated these last few weeks, and am in desperate need of a new routine to help me get the house together, get baby girl sleeping in her crib, and to simply get us out of the house (because we’ve been cooped up too long!).

Sometimes, life is tough, but God is so good. He’s blessed us with so much, and I know that it’s days (or weeks) like today that I have to focus on His goodness, rather than my feelings of isolation, loneliness, unproductiveness, or unfruitfulness. This season of life will pass. We will, eventually, get the house in order. Cookie girl will, eventually, sleep in her crib. We will get our routine back and have weekly library trips, grocery days, and outings. I will make time to write and share more often with my readers.

For now, I must remember that this is only a season of life, and things will change. What season of life are you currently living? And how are you handling it? Personally, I think I should be praying a little more…but, couldn’t we all?

Do not be anxious or worried about anything, but in everything [every circumstance and situation] by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, continue to make your [specific] requests known to God. And the peace of God [that peace which reassures the heart, that peace] which transcends all understanding, [that peace which] stands guard over your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus [is yours]. ~ Philippians 4:6-7, AMP

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So You’re Thinking of Moving Out? (Or Perhaps You Should Be)

You’re 18 (or older) and you’re thinking about moving out of your parents’ house. I’d like to suggest you stop and ask yourself a few questions before you do.

  • Are you going to college?
  • Do you have a job?
  • Do you have a car?

If you’re still in college, whether you’re working your way through or your tuition’s being paid by your parents, a scholarship or grant, I’d suggest you live at home until you complete. (Notice I didn’t say student loans? That’s because you should just say no to student loans!) Trying to cash flow your tuition while living on your own only works if you have a really high income, which most young college students usually don’t have. I cash flowed my undergraduate degree while living at home, but made the mistake of moving out while I worked on my graduate degree—these are the infamous student loans I’ve been trying to pay. Another option is splitting the costs of an apartment or house with multiple friends.

Now, let’s say you’ve finished college and/or you’ve gotten a job. First, you must recognize how much money you have coming in. Do you make enough to move out on your own? The answer, at first, may be “no.” I’ll tell you why. You need enough money on hand to pay a security deposit and first month’s rent. This means you’ll have to save a little money before signing that lease; I suggest you save 3-6 months of living expenses before moving out, just in case something unplanned occurs. You wouldn’t want to move into your own place, only to have to move back home when your car breaks down, or you lose a job! Be prepared.

Here are a few other costs you’ll need to think about:

  • Do you have a reliable car? Insurance? Maintenance costs.
  • Are you a single parent? Childcare costs. Will you have reliable/neighborly help or family nearby?
  • Do you own a pet? Monthly pet fees/costs.
  • Don’t forget those daily living expenses! Food, clothing, gas, renters insurance, electricity, internet/cable, water, & cell phone bill, etc.

Now, perhaps you’re an adult and you simply don’t want to move out? What’s your reasoning behind staying home? Economic? Your parents insist you stay home? Let me tell you something. My parents never wanted me to move out; they expected that I would stay home until I got married. But I’m 31 and I’m still not married! Thankfully, I recognized that I needed to move out and learn how to take care of myself, because who knew what God had in store for my future. What if I never got married? I didn’t want to be living at home forever!IMG_3270

Honestly, unless you’re a college student, like I mentioned above, I suggest you move out on your own. Something happens when you move out on your own and you’re responsible for your own well-being. You grow and develop in ways that you can’t do at home under your parents’ wings. You’re forced to become more responsible with your money, forced to make decisions that affect your life and future, and you meet people you might never have met, while at the grocery store, gym, job, church or while hanging out with your friends or volunteering.

If you can’t afford to move into your own place, again, as I mentioned before, get a roommate (or two), take on another job, or better yet, think more intently about what you really want to be doing with your life, and change career paths! Create goals and take steps to reach them.

Finally, living at home can stunt your growth and prevent you from reaching your full potential because you’re comfortable and have a security blanket (i.e. your parents). However, once you’re on your own, you are responsible for you, and you’re forced to push yourself outside your comfort zone! Therefore, stretch those wings of yours and take the leap (obviously, within the bounds of reason)! 😉

Love you all and God bless!